Why People Who Use Manipulative Seduction Have A Hard Time Attracting Love

Posted on May 19, 2015

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Why People Who Use Manipulative Seduction Have A Hard Time Attracting Love
By Christine Akiteng

Seduction comes in many forms, from the predatory manipulations that leave the other person feeling not so good about being seduced to the “reciprocal pleasure” that leaves both parties feeling elated as if they have done the “right thing,” perhaps even inspired the reward of bliss and ecstasy.

You know you are being seduced by a predatory or are being seduced by an “empty” person when their “seduction” clearly has an expected outcome or goal – self-gratification.

‘Empty” people are those people who don’t have a happy life and are always on the prowl, looking for prey, someone they can manipulate and take advantage of. The need to use another person either for gratification or psychological validation grows out of a desire to fill a void in their inner and outer lives. The basic assumption behind their thoughts and behaviour is that getting what they desire will make them happy.

To fill their emptiness, they are always scheming and trying to figure out ways of having the upper hand or taking advantage of their position, influence, power or deviousness. For them, the art of seduction is simply a “bait” to attract the opposite sex, a means of temporarily filling their emotional or psychological emptiness. These kind of people go around comparing themselves to others and trying to make themselves feel good by the number of women or men that they can make interested in them – this gives them their self worth.

A man or woman who seduces out of emptiness has often felt unduly controlled, rejected, manipulated, exploited and over looked by women or men in his or her life (especially those he or she has always wanted to impress upon) and so takes out his or her anger sexually. The rejected, controlled, manipulated, exploited and over looked seeks affirmation by having the opposite sex show sexual desire for him or her. Their idea of seduction is psychologically breaking down their ‘target’ and bringing her or him down to the level of emptiness, hurt and humiliation they’ve experienced and feel. They care nothing about the other person as long as they get what they want and as long as they enjoy themselves.

People who seduce out of emptiness often hurt others and incidentally get hurt when life, the universe, the cosmos itself confronts them with the consequences of their behavior.

After the initial “oh wow” attraction, the other person may discover that they were seduced by misrepresentation, deceit and manipulation and feels deceived and betrayed. The “seducer’ or “seductress” may find him or herself stalked by an angry woman or man who’ll pull out all the stops to ruin her “seducer’ or his “seductress.”

Over time, especially with more failed attempts than success in seducing the opposite sex, people who seduce out of emptiness become less desirable because their desire stems from abrasive neediness or inadequacy. Their attempts at seduction in the long-term only succeed in making them look like weak beggars.

Unless you want to remain a pick-up artist for the rest of your life – please do yourself a favour, do a research on the so called master-pick-up artists or players, 99% of them are still single and the older ones are referred to as “dirty old men” or “off-layers” (bred chicken that have lost value) behind their backs. A majority are angry bitter men and women who’ve felt unduly controlled, rejected, manipulated, exploited and over looked by women or men and have found away to get back at the their ‘enemies”. These people are constantly trying to recruit followers and disciples and to inflict as much pain as possible. Unless this is what you want, at some point (I’ve seen it happen lots of time), you’ll get tired of all the “cheap lays” and long for a deeper and more meaningful relationship with a man or woman.

But when you finally find someone you really like and one who might really like you back or even possible fall in love with you, you find that your heart has dried up and crumpled into worthless little pieces of deadness. You find that you lack genuine and illuminating sensation, feeling and love. You’ve become incapable of giving (and receiving) that which you have all along been seeking. You feel emptier and more worthless.

Whereas seduction out of emptiness is consumptive, draining and damaging over time, seduction out of fullness allows for greater desire, appreciation, and zeal for another person without an accompanying need to possess and destroy the other. Whether or not, she or he sleeps with you or not is really besides the question – when you seduce out of fullness, you’re already making love with life, the universe, the very fabric of cosmos itself.

About the Author: Christine Akiteng is an internationally renowned Sexual Confidence/Dating Coach and author of e-Books: The Art Of Seducing Out Of Fullness, Breaking A Bad Relationships Pattern, and Playing Hard-To-Get The Love Way.

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Posted in: Journal