Chapter 5. Learning How To Let Go.

Posted on April 23, 2017


Learning how to let go.

The trouble with learning how to let go, is that it really sucks to do so. Acknowledging to yourself that people you care about, and perhaps hadn’t yet realised weren’t going to be a part of your life anymore, who are trying to phase you out of their life, hurts. It hurts like a mother fu*ker. And part of you knows it’s just life, you tell yourself not to take it too personally, but you can’t deny that the rejection is shitty. It opens up old wounds too, and for a while there I felt like a little lamb learning how to walk again. It was slippery. It’s still slippery – because some people are just going through a phase in their life where they need to be a shitty friend to people and they resurface when they’re ready (or feel sufficiently guilty, and subsequently start breadcrumbing you). So what personal code does one adopt?

I’m literally at the stage now with certain people where a) i’m surprised when they call b) surprised they seem happy to talk to me and c) surprised when they text me back.

Doing CBT made me paranoid. And so i’ve decided to let go based on a similar marketing method I use for pruning prospective customers off my email database. If I haven’t heard back from someone after 2 messages / attempts to communicate then I let them go. If they’re a great friend and it’s worth pursuing and/or I suspect its not about me (after all, people get busy / forgetful), then I give it one final message to try to get through.

Life’s too short to waste time trying to force people to hang out with you. Best place your energy in the places where people are happy to see you and you both get joy from doing it, so much so that it’s a no brainer to arrange a time to hang out.

Tomorrow’s double chapter of ‘Hospital Visits’ and ‘NYE’ will be with you soon! In the meantime check out these previous posts for the archives.

3 Key Rules for Dating Success

He Said, I Love You

Social Cleansing: Is Clearing Out The Deadwood on Facebook Going To Help?